A Quick Link About the Pitfalls of Being Labeled “Gifted”

I’ve written a lot about my childhood; about how I was under enormous pressure because I was in the gifted program at my elementary school, about how they separated us and created a sick competition; about how I internalized comments from my parents; and how about in the end I’ve wound up depressed, anxious, and constantly felt like a failure. There were, of course, a number of other elements (physical deformity, etc.) that affected me and added to my eventual nervous breakdown, but I definitely go back to that elementary school having a huge, negative influence on shaping my identity.

Today I was sent an article by a friend titled “19 Reasons It’s Horrible To Grow Up Gifted” and I was amazed at how much it hit home. The article quotes a number of Reddit users who answered the question, “[For those] labeled as gifted children, do you think the label harmed you, or helped you?” Not every response applies to me (I never developed a superiority complex, for instance), but the ones about pressure, anxiety, constantly feeling like a failure, “Us vs. Them,” becoming marks for bullies, fierce competition, etc., sure did.

I urge every parent out there to read this article and give it serious thought whether your child is gifted or not. I, for one, worry a lot about Sienna possibly being gifted. If she is I’ll do my due diligence to make sure the school she attends is completely different from the one I went to (as one of my best friends [who I happened to meet in elementary school and is thus a fellow “survivor”] did when he investigated and ultimately refused to let his gifted son go to a specific school despite his being accepted into a magnet program), and I’ll do my best not to put pressure on her and to be there should she need to talk. The best way to prevent such things as happened to myself, many of my classmates, peers, these Reddit users, and who knows how many others around the country is through education and not just the type that occurs within school walls.

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